Why You Have More Creativity Than You Think
The following is a guest post from Faigie Kobre.
Do you ever feel like everyone is watching you?
Are you constantly scared of saying the wrong thing and making a fool of yourself?
And are you constantly worried about what people will think of you?
Or worried about not being good enough?
If you are, you probably wish you had more self-confidence, don’t you?
I’ll bet you wish you had a confidence pill you could just pop as needed, one that would stop you from worrying about what others thought of you.
You may have already tried some of the more traditional advice like “dress the part” or “speak up.” But did they work?
Probably not, and here’s why — to heal your self-confidence, you must heal your insides for it to show on the outside.
Fixing from the inside out has more staying power than doing it the other way around.
And in order to heal from the inside out, you first must understand the source of your lack of self-confidence.
The Real Source of Your Lack of Self-Confidence
Many factors cause the various dysfunctions in our lives, including a lack of confidence.
Many of those factors begin in childhood and usually reverberate throughout our adult lives.
The words spoken to us in childhood are a main factor in the destruction of our self-confidence as adults.
Positive feedback and positive interactions allow us to grow into self-confident youngsters. When we get no positive and lots of negative, our self-confidence shrivels up and dies.
With that in mind, let me take you back to kindergarten.
How Kindergarten Arts and Crafts Hijacked Your Self-Confidence without You Knowing it
Do you even remember your preschool or kindergarten years?
A large part of children’s early childhood experiences centers around arts and crafts instead of the academics that are the bulk of elementary schooling.
So maybe what happened to your confidence and creativity was what happened to mine.
It got hijacked.
My kindergarten teacher was a supposed seasoned pro. My mom thought she was the cat’s meow because I brought home the most magnificent arts and crafts projects.
None of which I had much input into.
Sound familiar? My teacher would hold up a model of a project and say, “Children, this is what we will be making today.”
We all followed the exact directions without any creative input. Typical, cookie-cutter project scenario.
I certainly gave it my best effort…mom was impressed…what could be bad?
Well, when children try to follow an adult’s idea, it will fail on many fronts.
Kindergarten Gave You Art Projects You Weren’t Developmentally Ready For
In kindergarten, you should’ve been doing process-only art, which is art where the process is what is important and not the end result.
This is the kind of art you were developmentally ready for. They should’ve let you mush, paint, and make messes without telling you exactly what to create.
Or else left you lots of room to be creative and make choices.
However, many kindergartens, to this day, teach art focused on results set by an adult. This harmed your confidence for two reasons:
- You were expected to create an exact replica of an adult’s project, which is an unrealistic expectation of a child. If you didn’t feel up to the task, your confidence took a hit.
- If you were an independent child who wanted to do your own thing instead of what the teacher told you, you probably got into trouble. You were probably told in no uncertain terms that what you did was wrong, which further undermined your self-confidence.
So, the crushing of your creativity is actually a big part of your lack of self-confidence today.
As my kindergarten teacher would hold up a project to demonstrate what to make, I remember saying to myself, “Oh, mine will never look like that.”
In my mind, I would have to make an exact replica of the teacher’s project, and I knew (with a five-year-old intuition) that mine would never come close to the teachers; therefore, it got translated into, “You are not good enough.”
So, the crushing of your creativity was actually a big part in your lack of self-confidence today.
You Have More Creativity Than You Think
Creative activities can actually repair your self-confidence even if you think you are not creative
Even if you think you have no creative bone in your body, you should know that you were born with a natural creativity that everyone is born with.
The wrong activities, and often the wrong teacher (or significant adult), made you feel so uncreative.
By jumping into creativity exercises, you will see how creative you can truly be, thereby raising your confidence to levels you did not know you had.
3 Ways Creative Activities Can Rebuild Your Confidence
Just as children start building creative confidence with process-only art activities, those are the types of activities you should begin with as well.
By doing a combination of these types of activities, you will rebuild your confidence.
1-You will boost your problem-solving skills
Creativity is all about problem-solving. It is truly amazing, but when you get involved in creativity as an adult, you will see yourself using your problem-solving skills that you never knew you had.
This will spill over into every area of your life and cause you to tackle all sorts of problems with confidence.
2-Your fear of making mistakes will be crushed
Real creativity not only allows for mistakes, but it also encourages them.
When you get involved in a creative endeavor of your choice, you will begin to see how mistakes are not only not the worst thing, but they actually allow you to learn from them.
Mistakes are encouraged in creative endeavors, which makes you less fearful of making mistakes in the real world.
3-You will learn to experiment without feeling judged
When you get involved in creativity, don’t involve the naysayers in your life.
Creativity is an experience where you need to experiment and create, and nothing needs to be “correct.”
It is therapeutic because it dissolves irritation and tension and allows you to fail without any repercussions.
You will lose your fear of being judged, and, again, this will carry over into other areas of your life.
So how will YOU bring creativity into your life?
As soon as you decide to bring creativity into your life, you will see drastic changes in your life.
Whichever outlet you choose, the benefits of creativity will spill over into every area of your life, not just in self-confidence.
You will feel a deep feeling of contentment and confidence that no amount of money can buy.
You will find that you don’t care what anyone else says about you because you know that you have self-worth and that your life will be full of inner-confidence.
This will not happen overnight, and you will have to seek it out. But, it’s time to jump in.
You have many creative outlets to choose from. All you need to remember is that it’s the process that counts, and nobody’s judging you.
Just make sure that if you take a class, it is one that does not repeat your childhood experience but allows for lots of individuality — pretty soon you won’t recognize yourself.
Here’s to your search for creativity and new-found confidence.
Faigie Kobre is a reignited art teacher who loves to help others reignite their natural, inborn creativity they thought they didn’t have, to help make their lives so much focused, creative, productive and just plain fun.
To begin you can get a free copy of her pdf guide “25 exercises to rekindle your natural creativity“