
A Walk On The Beach – A Story About Beliefs
You know the really strange thing about life?
It‘s usually shaped in those moments when we’re least expecting it. As I stood gazing out across a deserted Abersoch beach in North Wales, little did I know that a chance encounter was going to shatter my belief system forever and set me out on a path to become a Life Coach.
It was a cool almost cold morning in early December the sky was a slate gray and the thick clouds moved hurriedly across the firmament as though on some life or death errand as the waves crashed against the uncomplaining shore.
I stood at the top of the wooden steps with my hand on the gnarled timber banister and looked across at the ocean drinking in the view. I closed my eyes took a deep breath
“Ahh, I love it.”
I looked at my watch, it was 6.31am and I thought ‘Great, I’ve got at least 2 hours before my wife wakes up and wants to do some holiday type activity that usually starts with shop and ends with ing, so lets make the most of it.
Normally I would have jogged but as I approach 40 I realize that my knees aren’t quite what they used to be and I did have that little twinge in my hamstring the other day, so I decided a walk may be more sensible.
I trotted down the steps and straight into the teeth of the wind. It buffeted me like shoppers at the New Year sales as I made my way across the dunes.
As I came to the edge of the beach I slid my running shoes off and decided to go bare foot. There was no warm powdery sand today, just the heavy feel of cold, newly laid wet clay but I didn’t care, it still felt great.
As I neared the waters edge I spotted a smooth round pebble embedded in the sand. I bent down to pick it up so that I could skim it. I remembered the time I once had a 6er. That’s a pebble that bounces 6 times before plummeting to its watery death. Nobody was looking at the time but I didn’t care, I knew, I’d done it.
The waves were really too high and too restless for skimming but what the heck, I was on holiday. I cleaned the pebble brought my arm back, closed my left eye to take aim and went to hurl the pebble. What the….
Just as I was about to let go I spotted what I thought was somebody out there in between the waves. Then they disappeared as a large wave reached its climax in front of me before crashing down and sending spray into my face and stinging my eyes. I squinted trying to catch a glimpse of who or what I had seen out there.
Then all of a sudden they were there again and I realized it was somebody surfing. Wow, kudos to him I thought. It can’t be easy surfing in this weather.
I watched as the person neared the beach. I think it’s fair to say they weren’t the best surfer I’d ever seen but hey, who was I to mock, the only surfing I had ever done involved a mouse, a monitor and a belief that there really was free porn on the Internet.
Suddenly it hit me harder than a Muhammad Ali uppercut, it was a women surfing and not some young athletic nubile women either, she was 50 if she was a day. I stood there open-mouthed as she rode a wave close into shore.
Did I say she was 50? I was wrong! She was at least 60!
She bent down about 25 yards out to pick her board up and came towards me. At about 10 yards away I realized I had made a horrible mistake.
She wasn’t 60 she was at least 70!
She walked up to me carrying her board and thrust out a hand.
“Good morning young man, my names Florence, but my friends call me Flo”
“Hi I’m Tim,” I said.
“Pleased to meet you Tim”
At this point I remembered my jaw was still dragging on the floor and closed my mouth hurriedly.
“Wow” I said “That’s amazing, how long have you been surfing and how old are you?”
That came out way too quickly and seemed to emanate from my rear end because I cannot believe I would say something so rude, but she just laughed.
“Well Tim, I’m 78 and have been surfing for a little over a year.”
“What? You’re kidding me, you started surfing at 77!”
“That’s right. When my old George passed away, god rest his soul, I thought I needed to take up some things that would keep me occupied. So I made up a list of 6 things I wanted to learn to do. I wanted to be able to sail, skate, ski, surf, scuba dive and knit.”
“Knit? Is that some bizarre extreme sport?”
“No Tim, knitting, as in knit a sweater sweetie.”
“Oh right. So how many have you achieved?”
“All but the scuba diving, which is why I’m here. To learn from a friend of mine that lives just outside the village. She’s a great diver with a lot of experience and an amazing lady.”
“Well you’re pretty amazing”
“What do you mean?”
She looked at me quizzically and I get my first inkling that this lady didn’t really think like normal people.
I pointed at the sea and then the board, then the sea again and my mouth opened, but nothing came out
“Oh never mind” I said.
We chatted some more and started to wander down the deserted beach as she told me about her white water rafting expedition to the Dordogne in France.
About 15 minutes later we were off the beach and walking down what appeared to be an old farm track when Flo turned and ask me whether I would like to come and meet Alice. That was an offer too good to pass up on.
At the end of the track was a stone built cottage surrounded by an old fashioned dry stone wall. It was the kind of building you see on picture postcards complete with ivy growing thick up one side, leaded windows and smoking chimney.
As we got to the front gate Flo ushered me in and said she was going to put her board away in the garage.
“Just knock and go in” she said.
I did as she suggested and walked into the cottage to see a lady even older than herself cooking breakfast on an old fashioned range. She turned and waved at me as though she were expecting me and boomed in a thick Welsh accent:
“Welcome boyo”
“I’m looking for Alice” I said.
“I am she.”
“What? There must be some mistake. You must be 80 if you’re a day!”
At that point Flo walked in and started to laugh.
“Young man, you really are a bit age obsessed aren’t you?”
Alice came over to me wiping her hands on her apron and said, “If truth be known I’m only 85, but don’t tell the locals will you they all think I’m 105 and a Witch I shouldn’t wonder!’
“Pleased to meet you I’m Tim” We shook hands.
You’re very welcome Tim, would you like some breakfast?
The smell of bacon and sausages had not gone unnoticed and I thought it would be rude to say no and I accepted enthusiastically.
“So you scuba dive then Alice” I said with egg running down my chin a few moments later.
“Not as often as I used to, but occasionally when the weather permits and I get time.”
“What else takes your time up?”
“I like to do a bit of surfing too a bit of swimming and a bit of snapping.”
“Snapping, what’s that then swimming with sharks?”
“No Tim, taking photos.”
Being around these two ladies I’d felt invigorated, inspired and not for the first time, idiotic.
We chatted some more and by now I was not at all surprised to discover that Alice had done a parachute jump only 5 years earlier and that she was an accomplished rock climber in her day. 5 years ago I was lucky if I could manage to jump out of bed never mind a plane, such was my lack of appetite for my work.
Nothing much had changed since then I silently lamented.
Here was I a 40 something in a semi-fit state and already thinking that I needed to start slowing things down and that my dream of leaving sales and working as a Life Coach was just that, a dream.
And here were 2 ladies with a combined age of 161 not even close to being as physically fit as I was and they were speeding things up!
They may not have been as physically fit as I was, but there was one area where they were much stronger than me, and that was their belief system.
Beliefs can empower and serve you or they can limit and destroy you. Mine were definitely on the path of destruction.
Are you allowing your self-limiting beliefs to hold you back like I had been doing?
As I wondered back along the beach I started to feel uncomfortable, not because of the sharp sea shell that was now wedged between my toes although that little sucker did hurt, but because I realized that I had allowed my life to drift and be dictated by circumstances and other peoples beliefs rather than me shaping my own destiny.
Next time you tell yourself that you can’t do something remember this:
Your beliefs determine what you can achieve, not your age, not your family line and not a tweak in your hamstring.
We left Abersoch the next day, but I got up early to jog along the beach beforehand hoping to see the ladies.
My knees seemed surprisingly ok and that hamstring tweak had miraculously disappeared. When I reached the cottage it seemed strangely quiet and unoccupied, there was no smoking chimney, no surfboard or even sign of life .
I didn’t knock on the door, I just got a sense that I wasn’t really supposed to, and anyway I needed to get back home, I had an unrealistic dream to work on.
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Wow! What an awesome writer you are.
A blog I read this morning on the Raw Food Rehab site had ‘The Discomfort Zone’ in the title and your website address down below… so I was curious… can’t wait to read some more of your stuff. Happy New Year!
That’s one of your best stories yet. Beautiful. And there’s even a hint of the mystical toward the end, though I’m guessing you didn’t really mean for that to be in there.
Great post – we are what we do
Love this story!
Thanks for sharing, very excited to have found your website today!
For those in central florida, Flagler Country has some of the most peaceful beaches around. From the Hammocks to Marine Land is amazing.
inspiring
@ Bryan – Don’t worry bud, you wont wear out and best of luck with your goal! The fitter you get the more energy you get. I have a puppy that is showing me that, the more I walk her, the more she wants walking and to play. I’m on to a loser here ;-)
I find your story very motivating. I believe I have a self-limiting belief about exercise, I believe it will wear me out and make me tired. I have recently discovered that getting up early and walking for 45 minutes actually increases my energy levels. I would like to do it every day and this has become my new goal.
Bryan Whites last blog post..My Possessions Own Me
@ David – Good for you! I’m delighted that my story had such a positive impact on you. Best of luck with your venture!
Tim, what an inspiring story. I will turn 74 in two months. I have plans to expand my little business in the Marinduque,Philippines, but have second thoughts because of my age. But I believe, that I will do it after reading the story of Flo and Alice. Cheers and Have a good day!
@ Doug – Sorry mate I missed this comment! Congrats, you’re the only one that spotted teh last part and the intentional ‘mystical.’ feel to it. Between you and me I invented that bit to give the end a bit of a kick, but nobody even noticed – lmao!
@ Chris – I like that attitude! Yeh, I can hear me saying to clients now “You’re only too old to accept a life of mediocrity!” I even feel a post coming on ;-)
Thanks for this post Tim. The way I see it is that the argument we sometimes hear from people that we’re “too old” to accomplish something can cut both ways, and really doesn’t help in telling us what we should do. A few of my friends argued that I was too old to make a career transition (I was a venerable 31 when I made mine).
But the way I saw it, you could just as well say I was “too old” to keep tolerating a career that didn’t fulfill me. — Best, Chris
Tim,
That’s one of your best stories yet. Beautiful. And there’s even a hint of the mystical toward the end, though I’m guessing you didn’t really mean for that to be in there.
(Or did ya?)
Anyway, I have the same kind of role models in my life. My mom, who recently passed away, was forever energized by life and never gave up. She was always working, loving, living, moving, doing. She never quit. I have no idea if Flo or Alice were born-again “living large” types — who may not have been quite so active when young — or if they were always that way . . . but me own mom was pretty consistent about living life to its fullest, and living it with grace, kindness, class and wisdom.
Me? Not so much, when it comes to the energized part lately. But it really, really does help to read about those who put the pedal to the metal at any age, especially oldsters. Kinda makes one feel a bit guilty when one decides to take a staycation instead of going to Italy as planned.
:>(
Examples of people who really live. I always get a charge out of that. I’m currently reading another bio of W.B. Yeats, one of my favorite poets. He lived large as well. Tremendous variety. Tremendous diversity in his life. He took risks and took his shot.
Inspiration!!
2 Urban Panther – Good for your mom! That’s brilliant. I saw my mom die slowly and I think a massive amount of her problems were directly down to her negative mindset and believing she’d ‘had a good innings’
I’ll forgive you for this one indiscretion on comment length. Just remove all punctuation, that’s what I do anyway.
I have great role models for this. My parents, both in their mid 70s. My dad gets up and works physically hard all day long at this, that, and the next thing. My mother golfs every single day (no electric cart for her!), gardens, etc. In the winter, she walks on a treadmill to replace the golfing. This fall, she got up our trampoline. My daughters and I had to help her up onto it, and help her down, but she got up there, did a couple of bounces, and said “There, I can now say I’ve jumped on a trampoline”. I brag that to anyone who will listen that they put a lot of 20 year olds to shame. Needless to say, I don’t use aging as an excuse for ceasing to be physically active.
Dag nab it! I just remembered I was only supposed to be writing one liners this week! Sigh, I knew I couldn’t do it.
@ Candy – Glad you enjoyed it. I hope it works with your mom too, because it’s never too late. I once had a client who’s father qualified to be a doctor at the age of 69! He was still practicing into his 80’s. Impressive stuff.
A great read, thanks for sharing! I hope to be like that when I’m in my 80s.. the ladies you met prove it’s definitely mind over matter! I’m going to share this with my mother – she’s been wanting to pick up a sport for years but has always used the age thing as an excuse!
cheers,
candy
http://www.carrieanddanielle.com
how inspiring =]
@ Dominique- Just noticed the link to your site doesn’t work. It’s http://dominiquegoh.com/ if anybody wishes to check it out.
@ Mandy – No idea how I missed your comment, sorry. I’m glad the article was useful to you and thanks for taking the time to comment.
@ Dominique – It’s how we view things that creates the stress, not the things themselves.
Thanks for commenting and try checking these out:
https://adaringadventure.com/blog/wordpress/life-coaching/stress-is-a-myth/
https://adaringadventure.com/blog/wordpress/life-coaching/stress-is-a-myth-part-2/
Great story that you have shared.
It is hard to find inspiration through having to deal with so many stressful items daily. I’m glad to know that there are people who feel that age is no barrier to achieving what they want.
This was an inspiring read.Thank you for sharing.Those two women sound like fun people to be around.This article helped remind me not to limit myself but to always be willing to do things.
@ Jennifer – I started coaching at 41 so you can do the math on that one. Beliefs are powerful indeed and mine where serving only to restrict me and hold me back. Hopefully they’re a little bit more useful now ;-)
Wow! That was an amazing story!! How long after this did you actually start coaching?
I also like the quote Dr. KC pointed out: “Beliefs can empower and serve you or they can limit and destroy you.” Now that’s powerful!!
@ LMaxwell – Don’t forget that once you’ve bought them you need to put them on. That was always my problem ;-)
Thanks Tim, I am inspired…
I have been putting off jogging for a while now but after this timely post, I am off to shop for a pair of running shoes.
@ RJ – LOL, c’mon man you’re in your prime! And the tooth is great now, thanks a lot!
@ Wendy – I’m nearer 50 than 40 if I look at my birth certificate, but my mind seems to refuse to believe that and that’s the way I like it. Glad to hear you’re now super-charged – Go get ’em ;-)
@ Davina – That is a brilliant upbeat way of looking at things and I happen to think you’re right. BTW, not sure what’s happened to your link back but it doesn’t work. If anybody wants to visit your site its: http://lovingpulse.wordpress.com/
That was quite a walk on the beach! Thanks for sharing this wonderful story.
Not only do I appreciate this story of agelessness, but I also appreciate how the younger generation are so incredibly intelligent and aware of their role in the world. It seems that each generation surpasses the last.
Oh man that was an awesome article. I read the whole thing and am still amazed at the outlook of some of our senior generations.
That has lifted my spirits to soaring heights and given me a whole new perspective on life.
Thanks for that.
There is hope for me yet LOL and yes I am over 50
Wohoo I am super charged now
Here I was thinking to myself that I might be too old to take up surfing (I’m 29:)
Thanks for reminding me that mental blocks is the biggest obstacle you have in life, real or imagined.
Hope the tooth feels better!
@ Everybody. Sorry for the tardiness and also the blanket nature of my response. I’ve been suffering all day with pretty bad toothache and working hard on not feeling sorry for myself. I’ve got it treated now but still feeling under the weather and I’m going to shut this computer down and take a nap.
Have a very happy 4th tomorrow to the Americans amongst you. Contrary to a couple of jokes I made elsewhere, I WILL be celebrating with you and I’m quite glad the English lost that particular battle ;-)
Thanks to all of you for your comments.
I knew an old lady like that. After her husband died, she move to the Seychelles from England, got herself a job (she was 76) and worked and played hard until the day she died at 87. Everytime someone mentions they’re too old to change, I bring up this gutsy lady.
People like this are so inspiring!
thank you for this extraordinary and inspiring post.
As someone who has just handed in notice at the day job to pursue the dream … it’s hugely inspiring to read about the days BEFORE you made it. Thanks for sharing!
I’m going to bungee jump, sky dive and apply to be an astronaut next….LOL!!!
But seriously, you’ve made a point. I used to wakeboard, dive and surf before my kids came along. I was very much a beach person. Say to say…now I’d give any excuse (like the need to stay home to stumble on this post) to keep away from the sun.
Well, it’s time to live dangerously once again! Lovely post! And errr…stumbled!
Evelyn
What a beautiful story.
Our belief system… yes, it can limit us or set us free.
I couldn’t have written this comment a couple months ago. See? I do listen to you.
Fantastic story, Tim – what inspiring ladies!
Great story. Enjoed reading.
thanks for sharing
Jesus, Tim. You rule. If you weren’t paying me, I’d be paying you.
Shit, dude.
Hi Tim, I’m wondering if this happens recently or many years ago?
Have you started taken a vocation as a life coach when this incident happened?
That incident must have changed you very much.
Robert
“Beliefs can empower and serve you or they can limit and destroy you.” This is the golden rule to me, Tim. Words to live by!
Doc KC
Oh my! How wonderful!!! I am planning my 50th birthday in a few (well, really a couple) of years. My plan is to skydive. I can’t wait. I want to live like your ladies in your story, and experience life as an adventure. How awesome! I also want to experience all I can out of my relationships. Why settle? Why not go for it? You only get a limited time on this side of eternity so why not experience what is out there? Thanks for sharing Tim. What did this experience lead you to do besides the coaching? How are you living out loud?
Tim,
What an awesome experience for you. It makes you realize that you can do anything if you put your mind to it. Thanks for sharing such a great story.
All the Best,
Rick