The 3 Killers Of Hopes And Dreams
When you ask people about their big hopes and dreams they will often set off by telling you about an amazing idea they have, project they want to launch or invention that just can’t miss.
They will often talk with fervor and gusto, with a gleam in their eye and an unmistakable confidence in their voice.
Then nothing happens for a few weeks, a few months or maybe even a few years.
When you next see them, maybe their enthusiasm has waned somewhat as you ask them what went wrong?
After all, it was a sure fire winner, wasn’t it?
You will get either a shrug of their shoulders or a sheepish look on their face followed up by a string of excuses like they didn’t have the cash, the requisite qualifications, the contacts, or the time.
They will invariably say they were unlucky, but it’s ok as they have a new even better idea and their enthusiasm will spark up and off they go again.
By now you maybe suspicious that you’re talking to one of those millions of people who have great ideas that never actually leave the comfort of their own head other than in conversations such as this.
Maybe you buy into their litany of excuses, because after all they were unlucky that somebody beat them to market with their idea, or they ran out of cash just as they were about to get things rolling, or that their dog ate their blueprint for world domination.
But you shouldn’t.
1. A Lack Of Belief
The reason they failed is because they never truly believed in themselves and/or their idea the first place.
The enthusiasm wasn’t enthusiasm for their idea, it was enthusiasm for hope.
They hoped that if the wind blew in the right direction and nobody bothered to erect a speed bump (never mind a hurdle) and if they had wealthy, successful people standing in line waiting to give them money, advice and free help things may work out.
As humans we love having hope, it’s what keeps us going.
It’s also what paralyzes us.
If you have a great idea and you truly believe with every fiber of your being that is will work, then you go balls to the wall to get it out there because your belief system won’t let you do anything else.
Your Hopes And Dreams Suck
On the flip side, if you have an idea but deep down a little voice is telling you that it sucks as an idea or that you will fail and look foolish, then it’s best to keep it as an idea.
As an idea it has potential, as an idea it can be dusted down and resurrected in the future presuming somebody else hasn’t got up of their arse and implemented it for you.
Sure you don’t achieve whatever it is, but ya know, you might at some time. You can still hope, right?
And you can tell your grandkids about the time you came so close to the next best thing and maybe they’ll be impressed.
2. Too Much Time
One of the lamest explanations for the majority of people when it comes to not pursuing their hopes and dreams is that of not having enough time.
This is a lie comparable to I didn’t get your text, I was just about to call you, or the dog ate my blueprint for world domination.
I didn’t have time to write my best selling book.
Graham Greene managed to knock out 2 dozen best-sellers without ever writing more than 500 words in a day (this post is more than double that by the way).
I didn’t have time to start that new business.
Richard Branson has started over 400 businesses and some of them have been fairly successful and required a fair amount of his time.
I didn’t have time to work on my invention.
54 year-old Kia Silverbrook from Australia has already been granted over 4,500 patents and he’s still going strong.
What people mean when they say they don’t have enough time is that they actually have too much time.
It’s amazing what people achieve when they have a deadline to work to rather than a life time of indeterminate length.
Terminally ill patients often achieve more (usually with charitable efforts) in the short time they have left than they previously achieved in decades.
You do have the time, you just choose not to devote the time necessary to achieve it, so stop lying to yourself and others and admit it.
The final reason is uncertainty of what to do.
Sounds reasonable doesn’t it? After all if you have no idea what to do, how the hell can you get started?
But you do know what to do.
Sure you may not know how to run a sales force of 500 people when your product goes viral, but nobody does until they first do it.
You may not know how to get a book printed, an invention patented, a blog started, an exit plan written or a dog proof blueprint drawn up.
But who cares? You don’t need to.
All you need to know is, “What do I do next, what is the one thing I can do now that will move me forward? Who can I call, what book can I read, what course can I attend, who can I model”
“But Tim, I don’t know who to call, what book to read, what course to attend or who to model?”
Ok fair point.
- Do you know who to call that can tell you who to call? – Call them
- Do you know somebody who can advise you on which book to read? – Ask them
- Can you find a website that will list courses that may help you? – Google it
- Do you know anybody who is successful in the field you want to succeed in? – Model them
An idea doesn’t require you quit your job, remortgage your idea or sell your dog in case it eats your blueprint.
An idea just needs momentum, so build some and stop dicking about!
But What About Fear?
I recently uploaded a video to YouTube with the same title of this blog post. Afterward somebody was kind enough to tweet it and added that they think I missed a fourth dream crusher and that was, fear.
It was a valid point, when you think about it fear is obviously a huge drawback for many people, but you have to ask yourself, why are people fearful?
- They are fearful because deep down they don’t truly believe in themselves.
- They are fearful because they don’t think they have enough time and will waste a lot of what they do have chasing a fanciful dream.
- They are fearful that they don’t know what to do or expect, weeks, months or even years down the road.
If the person had said:
“Actually Tim, I think you can boil it down to one thing and one thing only and that is an inherent lack of belief”
I’d have said, “Fair enough, I can live with that, maybe there is really only one killer and not 3, and that’s not possessing a genuine and unshakeable belief system”
Don’t give up, just work on that belief system until the only option is one that moves your forward.
Note: I do realize that physical limitations can hold people back. It doesn’t matter how much I believe I can bench press 1,000 lbs, I can’t.